My Favorite 10: Terrible Quarterbacks

For the foreseeable future, i.e. when I feel like it, I'll be listing my Favorite 10 of something. With Inauguration Day a week from now, what better time to introduce something new than now? I have no set timeline for the future Favorite 10s. Maybe we'll save 'em for rainy days ("But basketball is played indoors through March," you might say; save it, wise guy).

Here is the maiden Favorite 10. And it's Favorite 10: Terrible Football Players

10. Tim Couch -- A friend of mine from Cleveland once told me that Browns fans cheered when Couch went down with an injury. But the best way to decipher if you are terrible is just how terrible your (better) replacement is. In this case, Couch was replaced by Kelly Holcomb, known for his famous middle name, "F-in," as in Kelly "F-in" Holcomb.

9. Ryan Leaf -- In his third game as a pro QB, Leaf was 1 for 15 for 4 yards. And he fumbled three times. Ya gotta love reading stuff like this about a player. Apparently he lied about a hand injury to go play golf. Isn't that fun? This has to be the kicker to it all -- he got fired at West Texas A&M. Not only does that place exist, but it fired Ryan leaf. Fired him! I actually don't like Leaf at all. Dude seems like a jerk. But it's hilarious to hear what crazy things he's up to.

8. Jeff Blake -- My brother would be furious if I didn't include Jeff "Fumbles" Blake in my Favorite 10 Terrible Quarterbacks. Blake played for seven teams in 13 seasons, and wasn't really terrible, but he did average just less than one fumble a game in 1999. And he was on the Bungles, so every drop back was an adventure.

7. David Carr -- He was the first pick for the expansion franchise. He was the No. 1 pick in the 2002 NFL Draft. David Carr. No. 1 pick in the Draft. He's had the wonderful honor of leading the NFL in fumbles not once but twice. Humorously enough, he was the stopgap for the Giants if Eli Manning injured himself. I bet Giants fans are happy that day didn't come this year.

6. Jake Plummer -- He actually was OK for the Broncos, but for the sake of the Top 10, we'll say the Arizona Cardinals Jake Plummer. Jake the Snake averaged a cool 19 picks a year in his six seasons in Phoenix. But it was his ability to rollout, cross his fingers and flip a dying quayle into the wind that really tugs my heart.

5. Chris Weinke -- He had a great last name, but that's not why I love this guy. And the fact that he was 89 when he finally got to the NFL isn't why, either. It's because in his only year as a starter in the NFL, Weinke orchestrated a great Panthers season, helping the young franchise to a 1-14 record, thanks in part to his 30 turnovers. He also has a son named Rex, which is widely known to be my favorite first name.

4. Brooks Bollinger -- When Chad Pennington went down with a hangnail -- and Jay Fiedler left with too big of a brain to be a football player -- Bollinger got the reins of the Jets offense. And Herm Edwards did all he could to not pass the ball. Bollinger looked like he was gonna cry every time he screwed up -- which was often -- and your heart went out to him. But boy, was he terrible.

3. Quincy Carter -- God, I love me some Quincy Carter (and some me). Anyone who quarterbacks a team called the Shreveport-Bossier Battle Wings is great as far as I'm concerned.

2. Rex Grossman -- Man, this was tough leaving Sexy Rexy at second. Is there anyone you'd trust less with the game on the line? Or any kind of lead? Or trying to come back from a deficit? Or tossing the remote to you from across the living room? I bet Rex's wife asks him to pass the salt all the time at dinner, and it almost always gets picked off.

1. Joey Harrington. Is it because he's 30 and still goes by Joey? Is it because he's been on four teams in six seasons? Or is it because he was supposedly so bad at reading defenses when he was on the Lions that their center had to do it for the team? Whatever it is, I don't care. Joey Harrington is still my favorite terrible quarterback. Maybe it's because he's a piano virtuoso.